my boy 21 he has aspergers

by sandra morgans
(england)

my son is 21 and has aspergers he always seems to have a outburst when we are out together, i say something that he does not agree with even though i try to choose my words carefully then he start shouting and swearing at me i tell him people are looking at him he says so fucking what we never see these people again i try to walk of and ignore him but he just shouts louder, i get so embarrsed he never gets abusive to strangers just me he shouts and swears at me indoors as well my neighbours hear everything i try to keep quite so he stop but i do argue back out of frustration sometimes which i no i shouldnt do as this makes him worse he even has me in tears and says are you going to cry like a baby he also has the tv blaring at 3 or later in the morning i ask him to turn it down but just get more abuse he does smoke weed and when he does he not so abusive and more caring and it calms him down and he tell me his sorry i also have two other children one with asd and one with adhd its like a madhouse indoors i never feel happy my son picks on the girls they dont get on and theres constant arguing my friends say they dont know how i cope seeing as im a single parent as well. I love my son very much he is on the waiting list for a flat he did leave home for a year and went to universty but then returned home a year later it was the quitest it been in a very long time when he was away at university he is quite clever but failed 2 of the modules in his exam so couldnt go onto the 2nd year of the course which upset him very much. please can you help me with some advice.

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Sep 02, 2011
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Asperger's Syndrome and Photography
by: Anonymous

Hi Sandra!

From what I have read, photography is excellent for those with Asperger's Syndrome! It doesn't require much short-term memory, which is a difficult thing for many with Asperger's.

And he could even make a little money with it. Have you heard of www.istockphoto.com ?

People sell their digital photographs through istockphoto.com and istockphoto.com acts as a "broker" so that your son wouldn't have to deal with the buyers, istockphoto.com takes care of it.

And your son would retain the copyright of the pictures, they would still legally be his pictures.

There are rules that have to be followed, especially when it comes to recognizable people and buildings but it could be something really good for him that could boost his confidence and maybe in turn cause him to be nicer to you and your children.

www.istockphoto.com

I hope this helps Sandra! :)

Please let me know.

Have a great day!
Diane


Sep 02, 2011
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21 year old son with aspergers
by: Anonymous

My sons interest are computer web design and IT which he went to university to study but unfortunately could not understand the programming and maths Part so passed 5 modules but needed to pass 8 modules to get onto the next year if the course so he gave up as it was making him very depressed knowing he would never be able to work the programming out the teachers were not much help either .. His now going to take up photography which he really enjoys ..one Of his other favorite thing is watching wrestling On tv his also gone and watched it live so here a few of the things that he had a Obsession with.

Sep 02, 2011
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Thank you Sandra...
by: Diane

Thank you so much Sandra for submitting your stories and experiences here. I have invited an expert in the Asperger's field to come in and answer your questions.

I will let you know as soon as I hear back from him. :)

In the meantime, my non-expert suggestion from the point of a mom is, does your son have anything that he is highly interested in (it's typical for those with Asperger's to have a few obsessions)?

If yes, is there any way to allow him to pursue those interests, in the hopes that it'll help him to calm down, until I can get some expert responses for you?

Diane

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For as much time as I spend researching Asperger's Syndrome this website should have thousands of pages but because my son has Asperger's Syndrome I find that the things I want to work on very often are not the things that I have to work on so I'm still not able to spend as much time on it as I'd like to.

As he heads into adulthood (he turned 20 on Dec 13 and yep I need to update some areas of the website where it has his age) I'm finding that I have even less time on my hands as I spend more time trying to master the puzzle of how to help him transition into "life after high school".

That's where Autism Tomorrow: The Complete Guide To Help Your Child Thrive In The Real World comes in.

It's a guide to help your kids after high school. You'll find parts of the book will be applicable and some won't depending on your child's current age. Although the title implies "Autism after high school" there is still quite a bit in there about what to do help prepare your child for "real life".

It's a great book!